Come Thou Fount

Last night we attended our Lenten Midweek services. Mostly, I guess I wanted to eat without cooking, I guess, but I also wanted to see my husband and see what the theme "Pause" could do for me. The hymns, oh, the hymns... we've turned away from these hymns to more popular music from Christian radio, but there is something in those hymns that nourishes me in a way the other cannot. Come thou Fount of Ever'y Blessing, verse 3 - "O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be. Let thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wanderingheart to thee. Prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love! Here's my heart, o take and seal it; seal it for thy courts above." How that hymn writer way back in the 1700's could put his finger on how I feel right now is a mystery to me. It seems that my experience is common to believers everywhere, at every time. That is a comfort. Can I give my heart to the Lord in worship and then take it back the next day? I want, Lord, for you to indeed seal it, as I know you can, but you do give us the freedom to go our own way. Lord let that way never lead me so far that I cannot run back into your arms.

He Pushes, She Speaks

Ok, so this blog is a low pressure way to practice my craft, but as you can see from the frequency of my posts, I could use a little pressure. I used to think about pressure and creativity as unrelatied -- we can only creat when we're relaxed and peaceful, I thought. But that is not the case -- like a lump of clay on the potters wheel, the pressure is what shapes you. The heat of the fire is what makes the creation lasting and useful. So though I am trying to discipline myself to write more regularly, my discipline can only take me so far... and that's not very far most days. So enter Lysa TerKeurst and her blog, delivered daily to my e-mail. I can picture her at her "sticky farm table" in the early morning hours, searching the scriptures and reflecting on God's word, and thne sharing those reflections with us, her readers. And I am convicted. My table is not a farm table, it's probably sticky more often than not, and it's commonly covered with mail and school papers, catalogs and book, under which my Bible remains unopened, because in the early morning hours I'm trying desperately to grab a few more quiet moments between my warm cozy sheets. The other day I read about the "She Speaks" conference, and the opportunity to win a scholarship to this conference which offers many promises -- Lysa writes, "you will receive the tools and the confidence to answer God’s call on your life. You will learn how to make the most of your messages, the nuts and bolts of speaking, writing, leading and influencing, and have the opportunity to meet with some of today’s top Christian publishers." I don't know if I'm anywhere near ready for that, but I do know that I have within me the need to write... sometimes is a burning desire, and sometimes I try to quench it with other things... but it's still there, and ignoring it is nothing short of disobedience. Obeying that desire and stetching myself is necessary, yeilding to the pressure and going forth into the world with what I have been given -- that is my calling. Dear Lord, enable me hear that call, and to answer with courage and faith.